See You in September

Scott and I spent last night listening to music and watching videos from the '70s and '80s. Listening to those songs brought back plenty of personal memories, but we reminisced, too, over events that dominated the news in those years: inflation and gas lines, American hostages in Iran, the Challenger and Chernobyl, Cabbage Patch Kids, Imelda Marcos' 3000 pairs of shoes... Life wasn't only disturbing back then, though; look at the past year or more. Quarantine, a hotly --and still-- contested election, riots, cancellations of people!, a shot (literally) of hope, and now that same shot, the very barrier against the virus that kept us all locked down for most of the year, is coming under scrutiny with regard to the current spread of the virus. Could it get any crazier? Personally, the last year has brought us some of the most wonderful memories. At the same time, we were deceived for months on end by people who claimed to be supporting us, had a considerable sum of money stolen from us by an unscrupulous attorney, suffered through a terrible tragedy, leaned more heavily into the Lord than we ever have, made career decisions and life decisions, and are experiencing one of the best-worst, richest-poorest seasons of our life. Bizarre affects us all, and drama never takes a vacation. As Scott and I revisited our teens and twenties well into the wee hours of the morning, we recalled the strange and the truly awful; they hadn't all been erased from our memories, but we saw them from a much different vantage point than we did back then. We went through them --without God in the earlier days, but with Him now. Praise God, He is never far from us!

A couple weeks ago, I felt God pressing me to do something. We put it off, rationalizing the evidence we could see, but wound up doing it anyway (A Strange Kind of Something and Something New). And now, I believe God is telling me to take some time off from Broken To Breathless-- just a month; I'll be back in September. From the moment I felt compelled to take a vacation, some things have given me pause: maybe I could just write one day a week, or maybe I could post articles from other blogs. How quickly we forget. I just learned this lesson! God and I had decided on a month off, and that's what it will be. I'll be catching up on some reading, working on the book that God has been telling me to write for the past several years, and listening to old music with my husband. 

Keep walking with the Lord. He will get us through. And I'll see you in September!

Promises, Promises!

Last night I sat on our sofa making reservations for an upcoming trip. To some degree, clicking on the "BOOK NOW" icon stresses me out. It seems so final. What if something happens? What if we change our plans? When I traveled with my children years ago, we drove until I got tired, pulled into the parking lot of some decent-looking hotel, and got a room. There was never any real plan until we got to where we were going. On this upcoming trip, my "no surprises" kind of husband is going with me. Additionally, we have the beauty of the internet, Google reviews, and 5x7 glossies of rooms and amenities. We can get a clearer picture of how things should happen before they do. Of course, there are never any guarantees. 

With God, it's a different story. In Exodus 11, we read that God told Moses what He was about to do with regard to Pharaoh. In order for His people to leave Egypt and no longer be slaves, God was sending one final plague, the plague to surpass all other plagues. This will be the plague that causes Pharaoh and his people to drive the Israelites out! In just the first verse, God uses the word "will" three times, telling Moses what will happen. In the middle of that same verse, God uses "when," as in when Pharaoh does exactly what I have told you he will do. You see, with God, there are no surprises when He says He is going to do something. There was no need for the Israelites to take out trip insurance; no need for them to get a little nervous as they packed their bags. Pack it! Pack it all! We're leaving! And they did. It happened just as God had said it would.

Someone once gave me a little book of God's promises. "When you pray, repeat His promises back to Him," they told me. I did, but God didn't give me the desires of my heart, God didn't always say "Yes," to the things I asked, and He certainly didn't do everything I asked Him to do. I chucked that little book of promises right in the trash. Like the rabbit's foot that didn't get me the boyfriend I wanted in middle school, it didn't work. But, God never promised me a boyfriend, and He never promised me half the stuff I was asking for at the time. His promises are "yes and amen," not my demands. He has given me the desires of my heart, but that's because the truth of His promises (in context!) has changed my heart. And His words are not meant to be thrown back at Him in arrogance or like some meaningless incantation. His promises are for His people, and they are grace-filled. He who has promised is faithful. He will not fail. You can count on it!

Unforgettable Love

Monday would have been my dad's 94th birthday. People often mark a loved one's birthday with statements like that, and I always wonder when they're going to stop counting. "Today would have been Cousin Tito's 127th birthday. Well, if he'd made it past forty-eight." But, I guess when it's someone you love, you never stop counting. Dad and I may not have been close, but he was my dad. I don't think July 26th will ever pass without me thinking about him (although, at some point, I'll probably stop thinking about which birthday it would have been).

Do you remember your ex-girlfriend's birthday? Do you remember the day you started that job you've been looking to quit? Do you remember the phone number of your childhood home? We remember all sorts of details and milestones --even the ones attached to things that took a turn for the worst. Some memories become a part of you whether you try or not, whether they're still useful or not. 

Zephaniah 3:17 says,

"The Lord your God is with you,

    the Mighty Warrior who saves.

He will take great delight in you;

    in his love he will no longer rebuke you,

    but will rejoice over you with singing.

Israel had forsaken Jehovah. They had not kept His commandments, they worshipped pagan gods, and they murdered prophets sent by God to warn them their rebellion would have consequences. But God was unwilling to give up on them completely. He had pledged Himself to them and He would not forget. 

Often times verses like this provide us with comfort. We think to ourselves, "Oh, I'm so special! God takes delight in me. He forgives me." And He does, but for the moment, take a look at this verse, and notice what it says about God. He is relentless in the pursuit of maintaining His reputation. He is determined to do what He says He will do. He saves, He delights, He forgives, and He rejoices over people who do not deserve it. Not because He can't help Himself; not because He has fallen into some sort of habit of remembrance. He does not want to forget. It is out of the goodness and grace of His character, He does what He does. He went to great lengths to restore His relationship with mankind; lengths that led to giving His only Son up to death as a substitute for us. 

That's a love we should never forget.

A Strange Kind of Something

A couple months ago God told me to do something. Before you question my sanity, you should know I'm not hearing audible voices (though I can't say that would be a red flag). I got this feeling I was supposed to do something. It was a strange kind of something, so I said, "God, if this is really what You'd like me to do, I will run it past Scott. If Scott doesn't give me a hard time, I know You are speaking." I ran my strange kind of something past Scott, and he did indeed agree. Okay, we were set. Then, something happened. It was something that indicated we might want to wait on "the thing". Then, something else happened, another thing that indicated we might want to wait. But, I felt so strongly this is what God wanted me to do! We even did that thing where you say to one another, "Hey, looks like God wants us to wait on that." "Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." So, we waited. Life went on without much changing. Except, I was uneasy. The smallest things were troubling me. I began not sleeping. The normal ups and downs of life, of our home, were weighing heavily on me. I decided to talk to Scott about it one evening. As we talked, guess what-- the thing, that strange kind of something I was supposed to do came up-- it seemed --out of nowhere. Is that what had been making me so tense? The fact I had dismissed it?

Well, I did it the next day. And the heaviness, the uneasiness, the irritation left. I'm telling you, nothing like this has ever happened to me before. It was the strangest thing-- stranger than the thing God had asked me to do! But, as I was out walking a day or two later, it occurred to me what a tremendous blessing it all was. You see, I hadn't obeyed. It took me a few days to connect the dots, but the Holy Spirit wasn't leaving me alone until I did. God wanted something in my life to change. I had allowed circumstances to distract me from making the change; I thought it was "proof" the change was unnecessary. But I was looking at it with my eyes instead of my faith. Ever do a trust fall? To say you trust someone, but never actually fall back into their arms is not trust. Faith without obedience is no kind of faith at all.

So what's your thing? What is it you believe God is calling you to do that you haven't done yet? What is it He has confirmed over and over again that you just don't think is necessary? Do it! Speak to that person. Give that extra money. Walk another mile. Whatever it is that has seemed so illogical or unnecessary, but God keeps putting it in your ear and on your heart? Do it! Do that strange kind of something. 

Not the Latest Fad

Fad (fad): A trivial fancy adopted and pursued with irrational zeal for a brief period of time 

Do you realize, Americans went from the Fitbit craze, counting steps and calories with pinpoint accuracy, to binge-watching British television for hours on end? Think about it. Before COVID, people had apps and wearables that measured multiple aspects of health: blood pressure, heart rate, activity level. Now, it seems, the apps have been put to sleep and those wearables are without a charge. The fitness fad will be back around, of that I'm sure (I was around for leg warmers and aerobics classes); but under quarantine, fitness gave way to TikTok dances, IGTV recipes, and Zoom happy hours. Now that things are moving again, another fad waits in the wings.

Does it surprise you that people are fickle? People love something new. New outfit, new hairstyle, new ride. Newness brings with it anticipation and an element of uncertainty. What will it all look like when it comes to fruition? What will it feel like to be sitting in my newly renovated living room? What will the people at my new job be like? And then there's the sense of unlimited potential. With a new look we might feel more confident, inspiring us to take steps we wouldn't normally take: talk to the boss about a raise, ask the girl in 5A for a date, go clothes shopping. 

New is important to God, too, but not in a faddish, superficial sort of way. When God speaks of doing something new, He tells us it will be so new and so wonderful, it will be so transformative, the things of old will not even be remembered. He says, all we have come to know will be turned on its head: paths through the wilderness and rivers in the desert, a beating heart of flesh where a dead heart of stone used to lay, a former fleshly existence put to death and resurrection to new life by the power of the Holy Spirit. This is part of the new covenant those of us born after the birth, death, and resurrection of Jesus have offered to us. As children of God, His mercies are new to us each morning; we awaken knowing we have a fresh opportunity and God's continuous care to live that day as He, in His great love, planned for us. And new things call for a new song, a fresh, personal expression of gratitude. 

New is exciting. New is inspirational. But the newness God offers is not faddish or fleeting in any way. The new that God gives those who surrender to His Spirit's transforming power is as old as God Himself. He secured it for us before the beginning of the world and its fruit is the very essence of His character. This new is not going away any time soon and it is as reliable as God is faithful. No fad to come will ever take its place.