Rich in Mercy

Mercy. Such a sweet, gentle word, isn't it? Hearing it may generate thoughts of a priest speaking the words, "You are forgiven," to a parishioner behind the screen of a confessional. Or, a woman whose son is brutally murdered by a young man not much older than her boy; she prays for this boy and funds his education, helping him turn his life around. Perhaps, when you hear the word "mercy," you think of God flooding the world. No? Well, sometimes mercy doesn't always look like we think it should.

Three years ago we were faced with the very sudden decision to put down one of our dogs or to choose surgery. He was suffering. The vet didn't hold out much hope for his recovery after surgery. So, we said our goodbyes and let him quietly cross Rainbow Bridge unmolested. It was heart-wrenching, but out of our love for him, we made the choice we did. Yesterday we came to a similar crossroads with our Tinkerbell: put her down or ease her pain with medication until her time. We chose the latter. In both cases, we tried to demonstrate mercy toward our beloved canine friends, though there is a great difference in how mercy was manifested in each situation. Did we change? Did we love one more than the other? No, it had more to do with circumstances than any of that. Bishop was suffering --greatly; Tinkerbell is alert, active, and she doesn't appear to be ready to leave.

Ephesians 2:4 tells us, God is rich in mercy. Rich! He is not simply merciful some of the time or only to certain people, but He demonstrates His character to all. He doesn't drag His feet and reluctantly let folks off the hook, but He sent His only Son to die in order to show mercy to the world. He gave His all. He is rich in mercy! The provisions He has taken to ensure none would eternally perish are more than apparent. Some, however, may not be so obvious. Like a cataclysmic, worldwide flood taking all but a few lives. Genesis 6:5-6 tells us, prior to The Flood, humanity was greatly wicked and "every intent of the thoughts of [the] heart was only evil continually." Sin multiplied exponentially. Anarchy. More merciful to allow humanity to destroy itself, or better to quickly eradicate evil and preserve a remnant? The evil and disorder in the world today cause me to wonder if we are repeating history, destroying ourselves again. It's painful to watch and reminds us how desperately we need mercy, even the kind that severs and tears asunder like the knife of a surgeon. Which brings me back to all God has done to save us from ourselves, the wonderful gifts of forgiveness through His Son and newness of life through His Spirit living in us, eternal gifts! Mercy is His nature and He doesn't change. If we are sure the gift of the cross is a merciful gift --and it is indeed!-- we have to trust His character. And though we may not see the entire reasoning, inside and out, or the scope of the story, beginning to end, we know He can. We believe who He is.

Sometimes mercy looks just like we think it should: gentleness, kindness, forgiveness. But in the times it appears cruel and difficult, trust the character of God, His ability to see the situation from an eternal, reigning perspective, and His great love for you. He is rich in mercy!

Goodness or Godliness?

I heard my husband as he was helping our grandson dress for church. "Good men pray," he said. "God's men pray," he amended. Oh, my! To hear my husband teaching this little man to be not simply a good man, but God's man... How it melted my heart. Don't we want our children to be good? After all, goodness is fruit of the Spirit. Being good is a reflection of what God is, but being good as a means to being godly is putting the cart before the horse, as they say. 

Mark 10:17-22, tells us a man came to Jesus wanting to know what he needed to do to inherit eternal life. He addressed Jesus as, "Good Teacher." This guy had goodness on his mind. Jesus responded by reminding him of the Mosaic Law, which this guy said he had kept from childhood. That's good, right? Jesus said the man lacked one thing: he needed to sell all he had, give the proceeds to the poor, take up his cross and follow Jesus. The man was despondent when he left, "for he had great possessions."

First of all, if you were paying attention, the man asked what he had to do to inherit eternal life. Does anyone do anything to inherit something? Isn't inheritance at the discretion of the one writing the will? I mean, you're either an heir or you're not, right? But hang on, we'll come back to that.

Secondly, this guy must have really been something to have kept all of the Law since childhood. He must have really been good. 

Third, Jesus told him the one thing he lacked. Do you remember? Sell all he had, give the proceeds to the poor, take up his cross, and follow Jesus. I know, sounds like four things, right? Well, this is where we see the difference between a good man (or woman) and God's man (or woman). Good was keeping the Law, doing the good things as a means to get something: satisfaction, reward, recognition, even as a way to keep someone off your back. But being godly, or God-like, starts in the heart. If he'd been willing to leave his past life behind --including his Law worship-- if he'd been willing to love on those in poverty by blessing them with the money from the sale of his stuff, if he'd been willing to crucify his own plans and ideas, if he'd been willing to faithfully follow Jesus with all he had, into any circumstance, if he'd been willing to start keeping the Law out of love for God and in humble worship of Him, the man would have become an heir. Without a death --in this case, the death of the man's ego and his method of earning things-- there would be no inheritance. You can't do anything to earn an inheritance. This pathetic man was all about checking the boxes, however; about doing things to be counted good. Perhaps, he had been fairly successful up to this point, but when faced with the choice to continue striving toward goodness or to surrender all and be godly, he went away sad.

God is good. Being a good person is imitating what He is. But when we lay down our agendas and schedules, and follow who He is, Jesus, we become godly men and women, for no one is good but God.

Still

Right now --probably not when you're reading this, but as I'm writing-- the house is still. I am as alone as it gets for me. Mom is out on the deck, enjoying the morning sun. Scott and the girls are out and about. The cat is curled up on a bed and even the dog is sleeping peacefully. Still. Such a wondrous state! I do everything I can not to waste these precious moments of stillness. For instance, in the time it took me to type these first few sentences, the teapot whistled, so I jumped up to make my tea. The dog sensed my movement and decided she must need to go out. Because the dog barked at the door, Mom supposed she should be doing something and came inside. The cat noticed the commotion and is now summoning me to let him down to the basement. Just like that, the house is no longer still, and neither am I. 

Psalm 46:10a says, Be still and know that I am God. The stillness that God is talking about is a "do nothing" kind of stillness. A "wait" kind of stillness. A "watch and see" kind of stillness. But, how is anyone supposed to remain still when so much is going on? How is anyone supposed to remain still when someone around here always needs something? The stillness that comes from God begins on the inside, where His Spirit resides, and works its way out. Obviously, when the smoke detector is screaming or the car is careening out of control or the paint can is tottering toward the new carpet, doing nothing, waiting, watching may not be an option --on the outside-- but inside, our attitude, our fear, our anger needs to take a still kind of approach. Still leaves no room for blame or rudeness or unkindness or unforgiveness. Still leaves no room for controlling the things that belong in God's control. Doing things makes us feel like we're in control. Who doesn't want to feel like they have some sort of control --at least, over their own lives? But, Proverbs 21:31 says, The horse is made ready for the day of battle, but the victory belongs to the Lord. We need to do the things we're told to do and let God do what He does. And He does give us things to do, but when it comes to His work, we need to keep our hands off; and when it comes to His glory, He alone is worthy of it. 

Joni Eareckson Tada, in her book A Place of Healing, asks, "How do we bring God glory in a time of trial or limitation?" I think her answers apply, too, to the practice of being still, of doing nothing because this is God's territory, of waiting and watching to see what He will do:

• Breathe in His presence. Notice Him. Wherever you are, He is there. Take time to look for Him and give Him thanks.
• Don't despise the discipline of the Lord. Endure hardship as discipline. We often think of discipline as punishment, but discipline is about making disciples, pruning and sharpening us, leading us through the fire.
• Stay supercharged. Keep your spiritual tank full. Read God's Word, praise Him, pray, attend worship regularly, fellowship with other believers, have others pray with you and for you, and serve.
• Keep a humble heart. It's not all about you. If you are a believer, your highest goal should be to bring God glory. Relinquish your agenda.
• Maintain a childlike wonder about life. Don't take yourself or your circumstances too seriously. This life is but a vapor and God will give and take away as He sees fit. Find the joy in it.
• Serve wholeheartedly. Service to others takes us out of ourselves. When we serve with gladness, as we are commanded, we will know peace.
• Pour out your all. You can't be still when you are wrestling to keep all the stuff you have; let go! When Jesus is all you have you can rest knowing He will never leave you or forsake you.
• Don't hold back on life. Join the circus. God numbers our days, gives the increase, and decides where we will go. We are not totally, personally, irrevocably responsible for everything. 

Set your sights on bringing glory to Him --especially in the chaos. We cannot know what God will do until we are still.

Review: Word for Word Bible Comics' Jonah

So this is a bit different, but I couldn't resist. A cool opportunity from Bible Gateway's Blogger Grid arose (in case you haven't noticed, I've been displaying their badge for a few weeks now). They offered their members a digital preview of a Word for Word Bible comic being released here in the US. All I had to do was read my free comic book and write a review. WIN! Word for Word is a project by Simon Amadeus Pillario. He has several titles overseas, but currently just one (Matthew) is available for immediate purchase in the states; the one I enjoyed, Jonah, drops on November 1st (preorder it here). Allow me to say, our daughter has a friend in England who once had his fill of filet and crab legs at our expense and I just might be suggesting it's high time for payback. The least he could do is pick up one or two of the titles not yet available to us here. (Seb, you know who you are)

Pillario describes his comics as, "Unabridged, historically rich graphic novel of the Bible with a high view of scripture." I definitely agree. There is no skimping on facts or lack of research in these books. Included in the first few pages is Pillario's explanation of his treatment of biblical text. He genuinely makes an effort to rightly divide the Word of Truth. The end of the book is filled with pages of additional historical information, exegetical insights, and even a brief discussion of some controversy concerning the account of Jonah. This is not your second-grader's comic book. Additionally, I should mention, these graphics are recommended for those twelve years and fifteen years+. The advisory is due to the artist's renderings of topics addressed throughout Scripture. He in no way glorifies or exploits sin, but he does lend his talents to accurately portraying events.

And his artwork! As a kid, I loved to read. Words were always my thing. Sitting next to my dad on a Sunday afternoon reading the Comics was a moment in time worth putting up with all those pictures! After time, I began to enjoy them, and Mom bought me entire comic books of my own: superheroes and funnies. What I wouldn't give to have that collection! The artwork in Jonah not only brought back some wonderful memories, but it is top notch. Images and fonts communicate text in an entirely different way; the author creatively uses them to reinforce changes in language and tone. As a visual learner, I tend to picture events in my mind as I read. Seeing Pillario's interpretation of things that are not specifically addressed in Scripture adds a new dimension and new possibilities to ideas that have become so fixed in my thoughts. And his art is engaging. If you can find a fifteen-year old who isn't sucked in by these drawings, he's probably asleep. My husband has already requested I order a couple, and I'm planning to place some copies in our church library. 

I encourage you to check out Word for Word Bible Comics and preorder your copy of Jonah now!

 

Looking for Your Better Half? You Are Whole

Whenever I hear a sermon on Adam and Eve or marriage I always remember the Jovan bottles of the 70s. As absurd as it may seem (and in the 70s, as obscene as it was considered), the concept of two people complementing one another is pretty well expressed by that design. The men's aftershave and the women's cologne seemed to fit together in such a way as to celebrate the differences and the union of the sexes. One without the other functioned as it should. You would never know one was only "half" unless you saw the two together. Neither bottle would fall over without the other. No point in buying both if you had no need to share, but one without the other was intentionally asymmetrical; it looked incomplete. The premise was, the pair were definitely better together. What is best, however, isn't always that simple. 

Have you ever tried to find your "other"? All those cliches: There's someone for everyone and There's plenty of fish in the sea. When you're alone and you're looking, finding your other can seem to take forever. You wonder if it will happen at all. You think about the past: Should I have tried harder to make it work with her? You think about the future: What will happen if I never find him? You may question your standards: Am I expecting too much? You may question your beliefs: Maybe the kind of love I'm looking for just doesn't exist. 

Genesis 2:20 says,

"So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him."

The animals were brought to Adam to name, not in search of a partner. God knew there would be none among the animals that would be a suitable counterpart to Adam; He is not ignorant of anything. Up until the creation of man, all God had done He called "good;" after man's creation, He called all He had done "very good." God breathed into Adam His own breath to give him life. God created Adam in His very own image. God formed him from the dust as a potter would tenderly sculpt his creation. Man was to be a special creation, different from and superior to all others. The account of Adam's naming the animals simply points out there was none comparable to Adam. Like a father meeting his daughter's boyfriend for the first time: he's not the best, right? And God had actually made these animals Himself! God wanted the best for His man, but what did the man want?

We don't get to know what Adam was thinking at this point. Was he longing for a friend? Was he looking at these pairs of animals as they appeared before him, wondering where his soulmate was? Was he so busy working and hanging out with God that he never really spent a lot of time dwelling on it? What if he had asked God for a companion and decided not to wait? What if he had struck out on his own and decided to find his own companion out of the masses? I'm not trying to be vulgar, but how many of us have done that? We don't want to wait for what God is doing and we find ourselves crawling in the dirt with a snake. We are terrified by the possibility of being alone forever so we yoke ourselves to an ass. We give up hope in God and place our hope in a rat. We think if we try hard enough, or lower our standards, or pry open a door God has clearly shut we can make it work. We may not admit it, but we'd rather have the wrong somebody than nobody.

How could Adam have imagined what God was going to do for him? But God had a plan for Adam, and He has a plan for you as well. Trust His timing. If you are His child, He is working all things out for your good. He is faithful. Whether your counterpart is waiting in the wings or God is asking you to stand alone, you have been made in His image and for His glory. You are not broken or less than in any way. In Christ, you are made whole. And for you, He wants the best.

The Thick of Battle

I closed the door and let out a sigh. It had been a long day, and even from the top of the stairs I could hear her still whoosh-whoosh-whooshing away. Mom is a walking sound machine. She drums, she hums, but mostly she whooshes. From the moment she awakens until she finally settles down at night --some nights, hours after I've tucked her in. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh. Mealtimes I catch a break. She can't eat and whoosh, so she hums; but humming is not whooshing --I'll take it! 

Some days I forget Mom is in a battle. An insidious trespasser has stolen her adulthood, cruelly leaving her in a body that won't quit and working tirelessly to rob her of peace. Mom needs help. Not simply to dress and care for herself, but to remain at rest. Her confusion often translates into agitation. Speaking calmly to her, reassuring her settles her down. Albeit momentarily. Within minutes she has forgotten every reassurance and we repeat the whole process. All.Day.Long. And when I grow weary of all of this, when my patience has packed its bags and boarded a train to AnywhereButHere, when all I see is the battle I am fighting, I speak sharply. My voice gets louder. My movements, abrupt: banging on keys, shoving things into place, flopping into my chair. And Mom grows even more restless and uncertain as she watches. And the cycle repeats itself with much more intensity. We're taking on casualties!

In Exodus 14, the nation of Israel has been led right to the shores of the Red Sea with the armies of Egypt hot on their heels. Who would have led them there? God led them there. For a reason. But they were terrified, and they cried out to Moses, "Because there were no graves in Egypt, have you taken us away to die in the wilderness?" And they no longer wanted what God had to offer. They didn't like His plan. They didn't like the leader He'd chosen. They didn't like His reasons. They wanted to be left alone, and to remain in bondage. Have you ever felt that way? Like coming out of where you are just might be worse than the pain you know now? At least, where you are --in your pain, in your grief, in your rage-- you know what sort of devil to expect each day, but the devil you may meet...?

Well, if you've attended Sunday school a day in your life, you know what happened. God parted the sea and His people walked to the other side on dry land. After being faced with the prospect of perishing on the beaches of Egypt, Israel's only escape is a four hour (or more) trek between walls of water that, perhaps, towered over their heads by thousands of feet. Talk about tough choices! I get claustrophobic just hanging out at the aquarium! But God sometimes leads us into battles much more grueling than the situation we're in, battles that leave us bruised and broken and bloody, so that we can know He is our Fortress, He is our Healer, He is our Warrior and Savior. 

The battle Mom is in, God has permitted me to be of some help, but it places me right in the thick of things as well. When my eyes are on those tremendous walls of water, fearful they could come crashing down on me at any moment, I am paralyzed with fear. When I hear the roar of the chariots behind me, and see the crowd slogging along ahead of me, and I can't get to the other side fast enough, I wear myself out and drag others down. I want Mom to be well. I've prayed for Mom to be well. But right now, this is God's plan, to take us from here to who knows what. I will trust and follow Him into battle.

A Pile of Dust to God's Masterpiece

On our refrigerator hang great works of art sent to us from across the world. One is a signed self-portrait; the other, a still life. We know the artists personally. I was visiting a friend recently, and she has similar pieces, but they in no way rival the masterpieces that we possess. She foolishly believes her works are superior, but-- ha! I can clearly see the consummate value in our crayon sur bleu. Anyone would, wouldn't they? Well, maybe not. As they say, "Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder." Our valuable works of art were done by someone special. The materials themselves --crayon on blue construction paper-- are of little monetary value, and I'm not sure the drawings themselves show any special promise, but for them to receive such a place of honor, it is obvious they are worth a great sum. It is the artist and the place he holds in our heart that has made it so.

Someone once estimated the value of the elements of the human body at $1.98. I believe, due to inflation, we're at $160 or so. As far as what good we do or our benefit to society, some may not be worth their weight in gold, so to speak. The sum total of contributions on all of my best days may not equal the withdrawals I have made or the malignity I have brought on society on just one of my bad days. In the grand scheme of things, none of us is worth much in and of ourselves. But the Bible tells us we were made from dust and to dust we shall return. How much is a scoop of dust worth? Mankind was created in God's image. Worth was superimposed upon us at creation by the One who is Creator. Our being may have been created with materials worth less than an average week's groceries, but God says we are worth so much more. How much more? His life. 

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. ~John 3:16

The sad irony is, despite our unworthiness absent our Creator, and the tremendous value He places on us, we have it fatally backward. We dismiss Him as being no longer of any value and fill ourselves with a false sense of importance. If He is valueless, from where does our value come? 

~ From the things we do. Anyone here an overachiever? Anyone here busy, busy, busy until your body finally just gives out?

~ From the things we tell ourselves. Anyone here constantly moving those goal posts, pushing ourselves a little further? Anyone here comparing themselves with others?

~ From the things others tell us. Anyone here counting up all those "Likes"? Anyone here a people pleaser?

What happens when we can no longer do? What happens when we let ourselves down? What happens when someone ghosts us? Our value has to come from Someone bigger than our calendars or ourselves or the people around us.

Phillip Yancey, in his book, A Companion in Crisis, paraphrases John Donne when he says:

My dust and ashes form the temple of the Holy Spirit --could marble be more precious?

At the very least, we were created to be in partnership with our Creator. We were made in His image and given the authority to govern the rest of creation. At best, we are His temples; His Spirit lives in each of us, transforming us into the image of Jesus. That is true worth.

In and of ourselves, we are crayon on construction paper. Our plans have no more potential than drawings on a fridge. Our schedule has no greater longevity or eternal legacy than that artwork, remaining only until new pictures take their place. We are but dust. 

Dust formed, esteemed, and inhabited by the Living God. What a glorious God He is!

Humble and Quiet

Years ago, someone gave me a beautiful graphic of the book of Ephesians, all of the wonderful affirmations God speaks over us in Jesus Christ. (I have been blessed with every spiritual blessing --Ephesians 1:3; I have been chosen before the foundation of the world --1:4a; I am holy and blameless --l:4b; I have been predestined and adopted in love --1:5; I have redemption through Christ’s blood, the forgiveness of my trespasses --1:7; I have obtained an inheritance in heaven --1:10; I have been sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise --1:13 And that's just chapter one!)  I have been wrestling with the question, Who am I? But not, Who am I? In Christ, I am all those things. The question I have been contemplating is, Who am I?

The Holy Spirit has been sending up flares about my quiet time with Him. And what He's been showing me is, I'm not being very quiet. I may no longer be a readaversesayaquickprayercheckthebox "devotee," but what I am now is not much better. I study for hours and never truly learn anything. I research and read, and never hear God's voice. I bow my head and speak to Him and even stay on track, but never have a conversation with Him. It's not because He doesn't want to speak to me. It's because I'm not listening. The concept of listening, of being quiet every single day is not something I have been practicing. Hence the question, Who am I? What makes me think I am too good, or too busy to listen to God?

Months ago, we had some difficult things going on; I was crying out to God --and listening for an answer. A word came to me: HUMBLE. (If you're anything close to my age, you might be thinking of Charlotte's Web right now, but stick with me.) At the time, I assumed God was telling me I needed to be humble. I get it, I really do. I am a fairly well educated, over-achiever with a leadership mentality. I can be pretty tenacious, fearless, tough. I can run roughshod over people and approach things in a my-way-or-the-highway type of way. And I am busy, always busy. (I share this only because some of you may have the same hang-ups, things standing in the way of God and what He has called you to do.) I need to be humble if I'm going to minister to others in the name of Jesus. How can I be genuinely humble before people if I'm not humble before God? If I refuse (Let's call it what it is!) to be humble toward the God of the universe, if I refuse to listen to Him, how can I listen to the hearts of people? If I am unwilling to put aside things I want to do --even the things I tell myself I have to do-- so that I can be quiet before God in obedience to Him, so that I can be quiet before God and hear what He wants to say, what use am I?

I felt God calling me to leave my paying job to write a book. It's been difficult. Mom's needs have increased and require more of my time and attention. Instead of becoming frustrated by the "disturbance" of all this, I need to be humble, be quiet, trust that His ways are not my ways, and His plans are good. If God called me to write (and I believe He has) He will handle it all. In His way. In His time. My job is to be humble and listen for His voice, His schedule, His heartbeat. 

Decisions, Decisions

The other evening I found myself craving a snack. I try not to eat before bedtime, but when I really find myself struggling, I try to opt for something healthy. Peanuts are a good option, right? Maybe for you, but peanuts tend to wreak havoc on my metabolism; I toss and turn most of the night if I eat them before bed. Does that make eating peanuts before bed wrong? For me, it is. I have people depending on me throughout the day. It's wrong to choose something that disrupts my rest and causes me to shirk my responsibilities or spend the day being crabby to everyone. Our cravings --and whether we indulge them-- can impact those around us. We might crave a beer, although we've had too many already. We might crave a nice looooong walk, although we promised our spouse we'd paint this weekend. We might desire rest on a workday, or a vacation when we're broke, or a super double hot fudge sundae when we're supposed to be watching our sugar intake. None of those things is inherently wrong to want or even do, but context and timing are important. Context and timing can be a huge part of the decision we make.

There's a flip side to all of this, as well. There are those who remain so paralyzed with fear, they do nothing. They are worried every decision they make will offend, disappoint, or face the condemnation of those watching. Like someone terrified of wearing white shoes after Labor Day lest they be judged, they choose instead to bow to the court of public opinion before ever leaving the house. They think too highly of the opinions of others. And while the opinions of others can be important, knowing where to draw the line is crucial if we wish to move forward. People mired in what others think rarely stand up or stand out.

We find ourselves in a time where decisions are not so cut and dried. The dissemination of information is easier than it has ever been. Any joker with internet access can spread information worldwide in seconds (no, the irony is not lost on me), and bad info travels just as readily as good. We seem to have plenty of bad information. The factors that determine our personal decisions are not, however, simply based on what we read or hear from news outlets or social media. They are based on life experiences and the goals we have set for ourselves and our families. They are based on fears that may or may not be valid but are real to us. Our decisions may be grounded in political affiliations, but no one affiliation is more or less noble than the other. We may be compelled to choose as we do because of morals, upbringing, beliefs, spheres of influence, vocation, or economic status. 

The point of my rant? Good to be right in the things we do, but how much better to be righteous? No one wants to make the wrong decision, especially when it comes to the important issues of raising our children, or continuing in good health, or remaining employed, or caring for our neighbors. However, "right" may have more to do with the outcome of your discussions with God than it does, your discussions with peers. I will choose what I believe God says is right; that, too, might mean what God says is "right for me," a personal sort of right. Like no peanuts before bedtime. 

• Regardless of our choices, it's important to show one another grace in theirs. 
• Place the greatest value on what God is saying through His Word and what the Holy Spirit is speaking into our hearts. 
• Consult with our families and take into consideration the opinions or expertise of those we trust. 
• Comply with the law, to consider the impact of our decision on our neighbors and our country, but to seek obedience to God above all else. 
• Once we reach a decision, evaluate it periodically and go through these steps, adjusting to changes if necessary. 
• Pray for others as they make decisions. 
• Show grace. (yes, I said it again --we need to be reminded as often as possible)

Has God Had Enough of My Schtick?

What can I have? 

Scott is trying to lose a few pounds. In the process, I've lost my temper. What do you mean? You just ate dinner?!

But I'm still hungry, he tells me. So, then I run through the options. After the first three or four sniffs or scrunches from him, I've developed a tone. I offer two more choices and I'm through. 

Do what you want.

I know he is trying to watch his diet. He has asked me to help him watch his diet. I have spent time preparing alternatives to junky food and shopping for snacks that might satisfy his sweet tooth without sending the scale rocketing out the window. And he resists. That's his schtick. He loves the attention. But it wears on me sometimes.

And sometimes I realize that's my schtick as well.

"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

Alright, just let me do this one other thing.

"Seek the Lord while He may be found, Call upon Him while He is near." (Isaiah 55:6)

Can I pencil You in around two?

I cry out to God for healing and surrender my day to Him; I commit to seeking Him in quiet. And then I act stupid. That's really what it boils down to. I ask Him to hold me accountable and then I resist when He does. I want to be healed, but then I eat the stuff I know will cause my body to rebel. I ask Him to direct my schedule until His direction collides with my desires. I promise I will take the time to sit quietly in His presence but when faced with fulfilling that promise or checking off a box on my already overloaded ToDo List, I go to the list. I know what God requires and what brings Him glory; I know what will be best for me; I know what I said, but still... How does God not get fed up with me? Praise His merciful name, He continues to work in us!

Years ago, I transferred departments at work. That transfer was what it took to get me to quit smoking. It wasn't even intentional; I wasn't even trying to quit. But by His grace, God handled it. I wanted to do a good job and make a good impression, so I didn't dare step out for a smoke. I didn't know anyone and most of them didn't smoke, so there wasn't the "camaraderie" I had, smoking and chatting, as I did in the office prior. My smoking stopped. But I still gossiped; I still wasn't faithful in my daily devotions. It was only one thing. Other issues had to be taken care of in their time. 

There have been times when God has put His finger on things that I am unwilling to relinquish. Sometimes He has moved on. He is not worried because I refuse to change right now. He is not throwing His hands up in frustration, saying, "Fine! Do what you want!" He goes on to something else. A little easier for me. Less of a stronghold. He knows what He's doing. Other times He counters my resistance. "Something needs to change and it needs to change right now. You have no idea what's about to happen, but you need to be ready. This is how I'm getting you ready. No negotiation." And He will keep His finger on it until I give it up. 

I think most days I am more fed up with me than God could ever get. God loves His people with an everlasting love. He wants to do the heavy lifting, for it is when He works in us that He gets the glory. We can reveal our heart to Him again and again; we can come to Him day after day with things we know we need to get rid of. But God looks at our hearts and knows our flesh is weak. We can trust He's loosening our chains without losing His temper.

Are You In a Relationship?

Our neighbor's son stopped by for a visit yesterday. Such a tall, handsome young man he has grown to be! He has a family of his own, and they had just come from having his daughter's portrait taken to celebrate her second birthday. Despite the rolling of his eyes and the snarky way he rattled off the cost, he was so proud. It was written all over his face. The little boy who lived next door is now a loving husband and doting father. How silly it would have been for me to hand him a freeze pop and tell him to "sit right there on the step and eat it so he didn't get it all over his good clothes." I still see shadows of that little boy, but it would be wrong of me to ignore who he has become. The way I relate to him has to change, because he has changed.

There is an excellent online course, The Genesis Story: Reading Biblical Narratives with Dr. Justin A. Jackson (Hillsdale College offers free online courses). Dr. Jackson observes, the word "man" was not used until Adam identified Eve as "woman." 

"The man-person said, 'At last! This is bone from my bone and flesh from my flesh. She is to be called Woman [Hebrew: ishah], because she was taken out of Man [Hebrew: ish].'" (Genesis 2:23)

Until there was another, Adam was just a being --what sort of being, he did not necessarily know. When he was able to see himself reflected in the presence of another, he could put a name on it. When we look into the face of another, we might see affection or hope --or even the value of time as years pass too quickly-- but we also see ourselves. We can accurately assess ourselves through relationships with others. Did I show this person mercy? Am I merciful? Did I speak an encouraging word over this person? Can I be more of an encourager? Did I forgive? Do I need to be gracious? Relationship defines us.

Imagine that sweet little two-year old, squealing with delight as she runs across the yard, away from her father's arms. Her father chases and plays, encouraging her playfulness. Now imagine that same little child breaking free from her father's grip and heading toward a busy street. Her father would give chase, but this time with an urgency, a desire to protect a child who has no idea the peril she is in. It is in that relationship with her, based solely on her needs, that the father becomes the father God intended for him to be-- playmate or protector: the administrator of abandonment and joy, or the administrator of structure and boundaries.  

The earth was good, time was good, the creatures were good, natural law was good, human life was very good. What was not good was human life alone. Was Adam alone? He had God --what better relationship could there be? But, human beings are physical beings as well as spiritual beings; that's how God designed us to be. Therefore, we need the relationship of other physical beings to give our lives meaning. Not that those relationships are the meaning; not that our lives have no meaning absent those relationships, but it is through those relationships that our lives take on some sort of definition: mother, father, husband, wife, friend, servant, supervisor, pastor, benefactor, beneficiary. We reveal who we are by how we interact with others. Relationship is the springboard for becoming who God designed us to be. It begins with our relationship with Him, but it manifests itself when we look into the eyes of others and see them for who they are.

What Did Jesus Do?

WWJD. What Would Jesus Do? Have you ever seen those bracelets or bumper stickers? That campaign spread like wildfire in its day. It was an interesting premise: you live your life like the Lord Jesus would. You make decisions based on what you think Jesus would do. Sort of like Jiminy Cricket and Always let your conscience be your guide, but with a biblical slant. But, it sometimes gave a false impression: Oh, So-and-So was wearing a WWJD lanyard; she's a Christian. Umm, no. And I'm not sure it really led anyone to commit to a relationship with Jesus, just imitate Him. I grew up watching Rich Little. He could do some amazing impersonations of other stars, but I'm not sure he had loving, committed relationships with each and every one. If he did, he was one busy guy! There's a distinct difference between mimicking someone's behavior and knowing that they love you so much they are willing to pull you up to be all they know you can be. More important than asking What Would Jesus Do?, I think we need to challenge people to answer the question, What DID Jesus do? 

When Scott and I began dating, I was emerging from one of the worst periods of my life: suicidal ideations, depression, bulimia, domestic abuse, alcohol abuse. I was a hot mess, but he saw something in me, something that made me want to be what he saw. I didn't simply want to bring his vision to life, to imitate the character he imagined; I wanted to become the diamond he already saw under all that rock. He called me "Beautiful," and I wanted to be a more beautiful person. He called me smart and loving, and I wanted to be those things. And it was because of the way he built me up --not just with vain words or flattery, but with a clear vision into who I was under all that gunk-- that I fell in love with him and I feel more in love with Jesus. I could see Jesus in him because that's what Jesus does.

Jesus gave His life so that we can have an eternal life, not just with an eye on "never ending," but an eye on "forever." Living in such a way as to do the things that will last forever. Living in such a way as to make a difference forever. Living in such a way as to celebrate and enjoy all we are given forever. Living in such a way that the eternal characteristics of Jesus' life are recreated in the way we live today. Living in such a way as to bring others into seeking a forever life. Living in such a way that, like ripples on the water when a pebble is cast, our love, our life, our kindness, our joy go on forever because of Jesus. He calls us to more because He called us to forever. That's what Jesus did.

Open to Obedience

Last week I thought I heard a door close. Veeeery softly. Something I'd been wanting, something I thought was sure to happen didn't. The voice on the other end of the line simply faded into cellular oblivion. 

I was disappointed.

Yesterday I heard a door SLAM! It was a big noise. The thing I wanted so badly, the thing I'd worked so hard to bring to fruition was not to be. 

I was angry.

This morning God awakened me early. There was a restlessness. Staring at the darkened windows, wondering if God would allow me to close my eyes for a few more hours. Nope. He had something to say. So, down the stairs I went. 

What did I ask you to do? He queried.

Immediately I knew where He was going with this. I knew what He had said, three simple words. I repeated them back to Him.

Did you do them?

I hadn't. He knew it. I knew it. I answered honestly.

Then you know why I shut those doors.

And I did. God was shutting doors because I wasn't obeying. God was shutting doors because I was taking matters into my own hands when I should have been trusting Him. God was shutting doors because I was working my own plan instead of following His plan. God was shutting doors because I was allowing the cries of my own fears to drown out the peaceful lullaby of His faithfulness. God was shutting doors because I was stepping on His toes, trying to do His job, and robbing Him of His glory. 

The same merciful God who cast Adam and Eve from the garden to protect them from living forever in their sinful condition, shuts doors for us, too. To protect us from failure. To protect us from following paths of self-adoration and self-sufficiency. To protect us from disobedience. To protect us from listening to the lies of fear. To give us a greater good and a role in establishing His glory. To turn us toward a place He has prepared for us, where we will see doors begin to open.

God Is There

How many times have you heard (or read or watched) the account of Creation? More times than you can count? That may be true of many of us. You might even know the first several verses of Genesis by heart. Even if you don't, you won't have to go very far to have your mind completely blown by the magnitude and grace of God the Creator.

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And the earth was without form. and void..."

~ Genesis 1:1-2a

In Robert Alter's translation of the Book of Genesis, he describes the "without form, and void" part as welter and waste, meaning chaos, turmoil, and nothing of any substance as from which to create anything. The Hebrew is tohu wa bohu, a term that indicates emptiness and futility; as in, it would be pointless to try to create something because there is nothing from which to begin. The Latin term for this is ex nihilo, out of nothing. 

Imagine nothing for a moment. You can't do it, can you? Try again. Nope! That growl in your stomach? It's still holding a place for something. The "0" on the scoreboard during Monday night's game? Still something. We can't imagine nothing because all we've ever known is something. We have never been without creation or its Creator. All we have ever known is somethingness and order: seasons, the sun rising and setting every day, seeds growing the same plant from which the fruit and seed come, human metabolism. We have never known complete formlessness and void the likes of which God has known. Even on our worst day. In the nothingness and confusion of losing a child, in the turmoil and confusion of divorce, in the welter and waste of a tragic car accident, in the tohu wa bohu of Alzheimer's, God is there. Is He afraid or intimidated? No. God speaks. God gets busy. God takes the chaos and disorder and subdues it, just as He did that first day. God takes the emptiness and futility and places it under His authority, just as He did that first day. God takes the nothingness and forces it to become something. He says to the welter and waste, "You no longer have a place here. Here is where time and light belong. Here is where life and beauty are given breath. Here there will be somethingness and regularity. Here it will be good. Here it will be for My glory!"

God's power and love --His powerful love, love that brings everything to be from absolute nothing, was manifested that first day. And is at work still today. 

Are You Hungry?

What would you give for something to eat? Chances are if you're able to read this on your smartphone or tablet, or even in a library somewhere, you are not in a situation where that thought would ever cross your mind. Chances are you have access to a kitchen stocked with food, or money to purchase food at a nearby market. There are almost a billion people across the world without the necessary food required to be healthy, one-eighth of the world's population. Almost 240 million of those people are in need of immediate, life-saving action. Those are some pretty staggering statistics. Even in America, it is estimated 42 million experience food insecurity. America, where, in many neighborhoods, food markets compete for customers. Our neighborhood --an area of less than two square miles-- has four markets, two delicatessens, countless takeout restaurants, and pharmacies with aisles of snacks and non-perishables. Food is not just necessary, it's revered.

In Genesis 25, we read the account of Esau, a ruddy-skinned, hairy, and I imagine a burly sort of guy who was a hunter and outdoorsman. His twin brother, Jacob, was the polar opposite if ever there was one. Jacob stayed in his family's tent, close by his mother who loved him. Esau's father, Isaac, loved the game he so skillfully killed and brought back from his quests, and Esau, being the oldest, was entitled to his father's blessing and the birthright (privileges, status, authority, and possessions). One day, as Esau came into the tent, he smelled the food Jacob was preparing. 

"Let me gulp down some of this red red stuff, for I am famished," he ordered Jacob. That's not a typo. He said "red red stuff." Almost as though, he wasn't taking the time to identify it as stew or soup or braised meat: "It smells like food. I'm hangry. Give it to me." 

Jacob proposes a trade: Esau hands over his birthright in trade. And he does! His words to Jacob are, "I am at the point of death; why do I need a birthright?" Esau's eyes were on the moment and it cost him whatever privileges, status, authority, and possessions his father was waiting to give him. And it reminded me of me. Does it remind you of you?

When I know it would be best for me to hold my tongue-- BANG! out it comes! And I forego the peace God is longing for me to experience. When I know my neighbor is hurting and if I get involved, that's two hours of my life I'm never getting back; so I don't. And I forego the opportunity to show her how much Jesus loves her. When God tells me to give more, but I hold Him at ten percent because "that's what we're told to give." And I miss the chance for Him to show me all He is willing to do for me. When the pain is so tremendous I will do anything to avoid it, and I do; I miss the ways God wants to change me and grow our relationship. When the gift becomes that which I seek, more so than the Giver, I will never know the full birthright to which I am entitled. When the necessities of this life become the things we revere, we may know the feeling of a belly full of red red stuff, but we will also know the emptiness of life absent God's best.

Expectation and Rest

I was eavesdropping: my husband talking to our daughters.

Did you read the owner's manual on how to do that? No.

And to the other, Did you make that appointment? No.

And then, One day Daddy's not going to be here, and then what will you do? 

Normally, I would have shot him a look of approval; my husband does many things for our children, including encourage independence. Normally, I would have given a smirk and a nod, imagining their faces as the reality dawned on them. But this day, I realized just how right he is, and how much grief our girls will one day know. There was no look of approval, I didn't want him to see how I'd begun to tear up. There was no smirk or nod, just an instant dread at the thought of these girls being without their father. They have no idea how great a loss that will be, I thought.

The other morning, I was reading Luke's account of Jesus' death on the cross. Jesus was crucified between two thieves. In this day and age, stealing something doesn't seem to be that huge an offense, certainly not worth dying for. But, maybe these thieves stole from the lame or the sick; maybe these thieves assaulted their victims in the commission of their theft; maybe these thieves stole from poor defenseless old ladies who were left destitute. Maybe these thieves were the lowest of the low. But one asks Jesus to remember him, and Jesus assures him that he would be with Him in paradise. Someone whose crimes were so heinous he deserved death had the audacity to ask Jesus-- who'd been executed unjustly and was in unimaginable pain --for a pardon. And not just any pardon, a pardon with a place in Jesus' kingdom! In fact, Luke is the only author who records this interaction; the other gospel authors say both criminals mocked Jesus. How could this thief, this fool think Jesus would give him the time of day much less a place in His kingdom? Never mind his crimes which sent him to this place, what about the things he said to Jesus while he was there?

Because that's who Jesus is. As three men hung dying, hour after hour, one came to realize the innocent Man suffering beside him truly was a King, a King gracious and forgiving enough to grant him a pardon and a place. The repentant thief had no confidence in himself but had every confidence and assurance in the One who suffered alongside him. Because of Christ's character, and not because of his own, he could ask such a thing. Because of Christ's character, and not of our own, we can ask such a thing.

My husband is good to our children and to me --even when we don't deserve it. We appreciate his kindness and protection though we don't always show it. We covet his presence though we don't always stop to breathe in the moments he is with us. But, we continue to ask, we continue to expect-- not because we deserve it --because that is just who he is. To seek him is second nature because he has never let us down. We rest in his love for us and his benevolence.

As human beings, we all tend to take things for granted, to focus on the temporal and assume things will always be this way, to try to scoop up as much blessing and happiness as we can in this difficult, broken world. Although it's a nature that should be crucified daily, let's not forget how, because of our Father's love for us, our Savior's gracious nature, and the Holy Spirit's power we have the confidence to expect He will not fail us, we have the authority to ask, we have the certainty to know He will always be there. We can expect without taking for granted. We can rest in our relationship as well as give thanks for the pardon and place He so abundantly grants.

It's All About the Using

I have a hard time "peopling." I mean, I like it when I'm doing it --smiling, laughing, talking about whatever comes up in conversation, listening intently to others' stories (which, quite honestly, I love to do, but more like a sponge and less like a participant). But, when faced with the prospect I am going to have to "people" when I leave the house, it takes every ounce of Jesus to get me out that front door. And when it is time to go, I make for the car, white-knuckling it home, radio off, total silence; I barely get in the door before I am ready to shovel my way through a huge bowl of pasta or sink into the darkness and isolation of-- well, any place dark and isolated. Crazy, I know. Especially since God gave me a big smile and a ridiculous desire to express myself; I am so much more comfortable typing or putting pen to paper when it comes to that expression, however. I've read about world-famous performers who have terrible stage fright-- I'm talking, throwing up backstage stage fright --but they have a gift, and when they actually begin to use that gift alone or in front of stadium crowds, their fears leave. That's sort of how I feel. When it's happening, when I'm "peopling" it's a rush, but the before and after are agonizing.

Matthew 25:14-30, is the Parable of the Talents, as it is known. (If you click on the link, it will take you to biblegateway.com where the passage is shown in three separate versions, hopefully, for a clearer understanding.) For years I had trouble identifying the issue the master had with "one-talent guy." As someone who watched her parents take unnecessary financial risks (and suffer the consequences) burying some cash for safekeeping didn't seem like such an offense to me. But, it was never about the keeping, losing, or increasing; it was all about the using. If One-Talent Guy had tripled the cash in some sketchy, illegal Ponzi scheme, would the master have been any less irate? I don't think so. It's clear, the master had loaned them those talents for the purpose of using them and using them prudently, as his agents, to increase his franchise. Holding back was not the purpose-- regardless of One-Talent's motives.

We all have gifts. We all have those things we are great at doing or just seem to come naturally to us. Some of us have no problem waking up in the morning, putting on that gift, and going to work. Some of us need to be dragged out into life kicking and screaming, only to find that, once we are working in our gift, we are as "at home" as we were when we were truly at home. That's because they are gifts, loaned to us for the purpose of using them and using them prudently (as directed by our guide, the Holy Spirit, and God's precepts, the Word), as His agents, to increase His franchise. We are not alone in the management of those gifts and we are not powerless in the struggle to walk in them. 

So, take some activated charcoal, diffuse some lavender, call a friend for prayer-- do what you need to do --get out there and use the gifts you've been given for the glory of God!

Summer Fruit All Year

I'm not sure if it's a regional thing, but our little corner of the world has a love-hate relationship with autumn. It's pumpkin spice everything or not at all. Folks are either holding onto weekends at the Jersey shore as if they will never have another, or they've stocked up on apple cider and sweet potatoes as if a summer armageddon will overtake us and we will never see temps below 80 again. As much as I relish the idea of a world without mosquitoes and humidity, the departure of summer means the departure of summer fruit. No peaches, strawberries, blueberries, tomatoes --even sweet, delicious corn on the cob (not a fruit; yes, I know). But, we can take solace in the knowledge, each one of those little tasties arrived in our lives with seeds, and some of those seeds will sprout, and some of those sprouts will enter our life next year as plants and trees which will bear more tasties. God designed it that way, and He says so in Genesis 1:11:

"Then God said, 'Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb that yields seed, and the fruit tree that yields fruit according to its kind, whose seed is in itself, on the earth'; and it was so."

That is not a wonderful assurance that remains within the confines of our gardens. It was no accident Paul likened the characteristics of the Holy Spirit to fruit. Galatians 5:22, 23 says:

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control."

The presence of God's Spirit in the life of a believer produces, bears the fruit of, the character of God. That is the evidence of God living in us and ruling in our lives. But, here's the thing that really spoke to me this morning as I was beating myself up over all of my foibles and failures, that fruit is there for me to partake of! I'm not just a new creation, a city on a hill, salt and light, demonstrating the goodness and power of God for others; love, joy, peace, patience (longsuffering), kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control are shown to me each and every moment of the day by my Father in heaven. That fruit is mine to enjoy! When I mess up a relationship, God heals my wounds with His love and patiently walks me through the stages necessary for restoration. When I fly off the handle unnecessarily, God is faithful and will not abandon me; He sticks with me as I ask forgiveness, demonstrating His self-control that I might follow His example. When I face grief and disappointment, God is my reason to rejoice and rest; His kindness, goodness, and gentleness are of a Father, wrapping His arms around His hurting child and whispering my name, "Daughter." When the world serves up trouble, bitter and hot, God is the sweet fruit that cools and refreshes His children in their distress, planting seeds that the same fruit might be borne in us. All.Year.Long.

This Is My Daughter

Isn't it strange how a word you've heard a thousand times can suddenly seem to take on new meaning? When Mom first came to live with us she was having obvious issues remembering. As time progressed, her cognitive skills became less acute, more muddled, like slogging through oatmeal some days and like breaking concrete on others -- difficult until you get to the hard part. Months ago, we attended a ladies fellowship, a gathering of Jesus-loving women with whom I had been doing a Bible study. Mom had never laid eyes on any of them, but when one of the ladies approached to speak to her, she attempted to introduce me! I've grown used to this over the years, but oftentimes, the person will turn and give me a confused, "how-do-I-respond?" sort of look. "This is my daughter," Mom attempted to say, and that's when it happened. That was the second time that day the word had come to me: daughter. 

I used to hate when Mom introduced me as her daughter. Our relationship was always complicated, and I was never sure what she thought when she said the word. There was never any of that relational, teach-me-how-to-be-a-woman kind of stuff between us. She never even spoke to me about marriage, or how to make a pot roast, or sex, except that I shouldn't do it. I'm not assigning blame, it just was what it was. We fumbled our way through years of coexistence. Perhaps I was uncomfortable because I wasn't really sure what being a daughter was supposed to mean.

The first time that day the word popped into my head, it was completely out of nowhere, or so I tend to think until God shows me otherwise. I was going about doing what I do when it dawned on me that I am God's daughter. That may not seem so groundbreaking to you, but as I said, a word you've heard a thousand times can suddenly seem to take on new meaning. His daughter. Not some representative title or honorary vestige, but real adoption. Predestined, chosen before the world was even formed, an heir, by the name and work of Jesus Christ (there is no name higher), and because it pleased God. If He and I were to go out in public, He might turn to someone and say, "This is My daughter." And suddenly, that word had an entirely different ring to it. Suddenly I knew what being a daughter was supposed to mean. Suddenly I knew what being a daughter was supposed to feel like. Suddenly it was the sweetest sounding word to my ears. Daughter. 

Sitting at lunch that day, when Mom used the word, to my ears it sounded exactly the same to me as it had for years. But to my heart, it sounded like so much more. It was the name given to me by my Father. I am not just a daughter, I am His.

Communion, Commemorate, Come Celebrate!

"Good morning, Church," he announced. "We're getting ready to take communion, and I'm supposed to read the Bible." His casual, off-the-cuff introduction was typical of this brother. He approaches all he has to do with so little pretense; it is a gift that gives him a very interesting perspective of things. "So, I'm gonna read, and then my wife here is going to say a short prayer." As he began to read, he struggled with the fine print. Glasses on. Glasses off. His wife pulled the Bible further away which seemed to improve the situation and he was able to complete that which he was "supposed" to do. His wife began to pray. Quietly. He turned so his lapel mic would pick up her voice, but it was still quite weak. He stood a bit on tip-toe and leaned in further. A strange sight, but effective. 

The invitation over, we all moved toward the rail at the front of the church. As I knelt down, I felt someone's fingertips on my shoulder. To the left of me beamed a face as bright as her ninety-watt smile. "I moved!" she whispered. "Oh, my goodness! That's so wonderful!" I whispered back. A long-awaited, much prayed-for event. "I sleep so much more soundly and wake up happy," she celebrated. "Oh, I still have my aches and pains," she whispered, "but I feel so much better!" I gave her arm a squeeze and leaned into her. "Praise the Lord!" we said, and bowed our heads to pray silently.

Later in the day, I was texting the woman who had prayed:

"Taking communion. 

S'posed to be think' 'bout Jesus. I'm thinkin' 'bout how cute you two are."

And I was. Not entirely, mind you. But I was admiring how they support one another; I can't imagine one without the other. I was thinking that's what marriage is supposed to be, and the marriage of Jesus and His Church, even more so. I was thinking how blessed I am to be in this community of believers. Believers who have trouble seeing or being heard. Believers who are so excited about an address change, they can't wait to celebrate it at the dinner table. Believers who serve one another and rejoice with one another. I was thinking what a privilege it is to be invited to Christ's table in this place and on the guest list with this unique but loving family. I was thinking about the Twelve gathered around Jesus in His last hours and what a noisy, imperfect bunch they must have been; so many different personalities and no painting to show them how to behave. I was thinking how the word "communion" stems from the bringing of people together for a common purpose, and though we come together in quiet reverence most of the time, sometimes that coming together requires a bit of unsophisticated, unscripted, only somewhat hushed sharing. I was thinking about how far God has brought me --from the person who would have scolded her children for such antics at the altar, to one who relishes the thought of joining in such revelry before the throne. 

However you commune --at the rail, in your pew, virtually-- by all means commemorate, but don't forget to celebrate.

Do You See Them? There They Are!

I am struggling. Despite the way I'm struggling, despite knowing that I'm struggling, I don't always ask people to pray for me. If people knew to pray for me and how to pray for me, they could "stand in the gap," so to speak, when I am in the fray and can't find the words or the presence of mind to pray. But people don't know to pray for me because I don't ask the way I should. I feel guilty for struggling the way I am. I feel guilty for not asking for help the way I should. So, I struggle even harder. Is any of this sounding familiar?

We all battle. We battle everyday. Ephesians 6:12 says:

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places." 

We struggle with stuff we can't even see. How are we supposed to do that? 

Just because we can't see them, doesn't mean God can't. Check out 2 Kings 6:8-17 (biblegateway.com is a great source, and it's always helpful to read in different versions). Elisha, God's prophet, had confidence in the heavenly army that surrounded them. Did he see them with spiritual eyes, or did he simply know from walking with God that they were there? His servant, however, could only see with the eyes God had given him at birth, and he feared. When Elisha prayed, God graciously opened the spiritual eyes of the young man and he no longer feared.

First of all, God never calls us to a battle in which He is unwilling to back us. God assures us all throughout Scripture, we need not fear, He will not abandon us. He has equipped us with the weapons and armor we need to secure victory.

Secondly, we are to pray for one another and ask others to pray for us. It may be specific to the circumstances. It may be as simple as the prayer of Elisha: "Lord, open his eyes." We may have to cast aside our pride that we can ask another for prayer, or step out in faith and share our experience with others rather than hiding in fear or shame.

Third, we need to look to our left and look to our right. If we are in a community of believers as we are commanded to be, there should be someone there willing to help in practical ways: run your child to school while you stay home with a sick toddler, make you a meal while you recover from surgery, help you with your move, pay a bill. 

The battle is hard enough. We were never meant to be alone. Open your eyes to the army fighting with you.

Choosing the Opposite of Blind Faith

Did you know that National Opposite Day is actually a thing? I wish I could say it was today and that's why I'm writing this post, but it's not. (Or, maybe it is-- could be Opposite Day, after all 😉.) National Opposite Day is January 25th. I'm not sure who decided we need to nationalize such a thing; I'm not sure why the powers that be would waste time and money doing it, but there you are. Worse yet, I'm not sure how I even discovered all of this. 

I have to admit, Opposite Day seems like something God would invent. Not that He is not everything He says He is, or that He does not say exactly what He means, but the Christian's walk can sometimes seem like one big trail of opposites: rejoicing in suffering, serving to lead, giving all and getting more.

A. W. Tozer, a pastor and author once said:

“Well, it is not to be wondered at. A real [believer] is an odd number anyway. He feels supreme love for One whom he has never seen, talks familiarly every day to Someone he cannot see, expects to go to heaven on the virtue of Another, empties himself in order to be full, admits he is wrong so he can be declared right, goes down in order to get up, is strongest when he is weakest, richest when he is poorest and happiest when he feels worst. He dies so he can live, forsakes in order to have, gives away so he can keep, sees the invisible, hears the inaudible and knows that which passeth knowledge.”

I would suppose, to the casual observer, it all seems a bit ridiculous, maybe even foolish; but, there is nothing about following Jesus that is either. There is no blind faith when it comes to serving the Lord. 

If you're married or have ever been, did your spouse come with a script or game plan? Was everything that would ever be written out and notarized prior to your saying, "I do"? How could it be? So, when she was unfaithful, what did you do? "For better or worse" it and work things out, or did you get outta Dodge? When he began drinking, what did you do? "Stand by your man" and help him through recovery, or did you ride off into the sunset? Either way, you jumped into a covenant, not expecting any of those things to happen. Was that blind faith, or was it faith based on the character and commitment of the person who stood looking into your eyes making the same promise? I'm going to venture it was the latter. If so, what if that person had never broken that promise? What if it was you, but they loved you anyway? What if that person to whom you gave your heart and soul was perfect in every way, they never let you down, they had the power to give you everything you could ever need, and loved you enough to stick it out and walk you through the growing process each and every time you messed up? Would you call your trusting in that person blind faith? 

I'd call it just the opposite: rational choice.

Forever Blessings

The day broke with the glow of promise: the weather would be beautiful! Cool fresh air filled my lungs; the humidity was gone. Birds and cicadas, the scurrying of squirrels across the top of our wooden fence. I could just stay here forever! So, I spent the morning reading on the deck. 

The afternoon sun warmed my face. Most of our human neighbors were off at work or running errands; animal neighbors took shelter from the heat. An empty quiet settled over the neighborhood. I could just stay here forever! So, I spent the afternoon napping on the deck.

As evening approached, backyards began to fill with the laughter of families resting in the blue-grey of the day; on the breeze was the occasional smell of a barbecue. Light began turning blank windows bright and crickets warmed up for their night song. I could just stay here forever! So, I spent until late in the night listening to the night creatures rustle in the brush. 

The next day, I woke up surly. So much to do. All those things I hadn't done the day before. The pantry was empty. Bills needed to be paid. Laundry had piled up and emails cried out for attention. Mom definitely needed a shower. By late morning, the list seemed to get longer --not shorter; my patience got shorter. The dog wanted in. The dog wanted out. The dog wanted in. By evening, she'd been out thirty-six times and she still managed to pee in the house. Yesterday was such a blessing. What on earth happened?

I reminded myself that today, too, was a blessing. The blessing of work. The blessing of money to pay for groceries and a market every three miles. The blessing of utilities and vehicles and a roof over our heads. The blessing of clothes to wear and projects to do. The blessing of Mom with us. The blessing of sight and a mind well enough to make lists. The blessing of the Holy Spirit in my life whose presence brings patience. The blessing of Tinkerbell, fourteen years old and still our faithful friend.

I could just stay here forever!

Are You Ready?

Are you ready to do battle today? The victory in Jesus is beyond all human comprehension, but it doesn't come cheap or easy. It cost God His Son. Which, while unspeakably selfless and gracious from our vantage point, was something an incredibly magnanimous God was more than willing to do. But, His work doesn't end there. He continues to work for His glory all the time. As life goes on, God peels back the layers battle by battle, trial by trial, to reveal just how capable --and I hate to use that word; it's so inadequate-- to reveal just how capable He is of gaining victory in every situation. He doesn't have to break a sweat or wring His hands or re-engineer a thing! 

However, those God enlists to do battle, they are a much different lot. We, His soldiers, worry and fret. We talk about the battle way too much and, perhaps, even talk about those fighting alongside us. We think we can come up with new ways of winning the war, and spend countless hours wandering to and from each battlefield devising plan after plan to "work all of this out." When we battle emotional infirmities, we seek one doctor after another trying to find an answer as to why we feel like this. When we battle insufficient finances, we rob Peter to pay Paul and consider cutting back on our tithing. We think, we plan, we feel, we see... When do we have time to do battle? The Bible tells us we "wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." (Eph. 6:12) These are supernatural powers with which we do battle. Do we honestly think we can defeat them with a spreadsheet or a week's vacation? 

We need to put on the armor of God everyday. This is not speaking some protection or curse into existence by the word of our mouth; God has wisely designed and given us armor perfectly suited to these battles. It lies in footlockers stenciled with our name, waiting for us until we put it on piece by piece. We must tell ourselves --out loud, if necessary; using hand motions or sketches or song, if necessary-- what we have in Christ Jesus: truth that holds everything together and keeps us upright; the righteousness of Christ that guards our most vulnerable areas; the boldness of the gospel --100% complete in and of itself, with no need for adaptation or abridgement (Check out Peter's presentation of the gospel to Jerusalem!); the exercise of faith (usually worked out in the most painful and difficult of circumstances); the certainty of deliverance that protects our minds from attack as well as during falls; the Word of God that, when saturated throughout our bodies and launched forth from our lips will deliver fatal blows to the schemes of the evil one and our own flesh; and prayer. 

Prayer! Prayer is how we defeat the supernatural. Seeking the face of the God who is sovereign over all. Humbly imploring Him for whatever is needed --grace, mercy, healing, provision-- so that we stand in agreement for what He has already given us at the cross. Petitioning the God who loves us and is working all things out for our good. The more often we come before Him affirming His goodness of plan and purpose for our lives, the more assuredly we believe it; the more assuredly we believe it, the more victories we will experience. There are no cheap seats on the battlefield. There are no casual observers. You're either fighting or you're losing.

So, are you ready to do battle? If you are, be ready for victory!