So that moment was my initial response to the time travel, decision reversal, "redo" question. However, the memory had not even completely formed when I began to think of all the things that happened as a direct result of that decision: purchasing a house -- the house that is now our home; having my second baby, the beautiful and talented Teenie Weenie, who has extended our family by three equally fabulous people; meeting the wonderful woman and friend with whom Mom and I recently had lunch, G; a painful divorce which led to relationships with Jesus, Scott and three very special children; wisdom, wisdom, wisdom; watching my Father God provide for me in ways He -- no doubt -- would have years before when I was so busy seeking His approval of my plan rather than following His. On and on I could go about the blessings that came about despite a terrible decision, a moment in time I regret. So, was it a good decision? Absolutely not, but I saw God's grace. Blessing I did not -- I do not deserve. Beauty from ashes. Breathless wonder from a broken life. And it is so sweet and precious to me.
If you are living with regret, seek His forgiveness. Surrender your life, that He might do what He so expertly, so powerfully does. Seek His will, rather than asking Him to approve of yours. Give Him your mountains, your molehills, your blemishes and scars; give Him your pain and your failure. Worship and serve God and God alone. And be called His own.
I will always regret the moment I grieved the Lord, and hurt others. But the loving God I serve has made certain I cannot look back at that decision without peering through years of blessing He so graciously has given me since.