Midweek: The Cockroach Theory

Welcome to Wednesday. This one crossed my path on Facebook --not my usual source of literature or wisdom, but this one is so true! We cannot control the situations in which we find ourselves, but we can control our response. The regular study of Scripture, worship, gratitude, and obedience retrains our brains to better behavior.

"The Cockroach Theory"

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady.

She started screaming out of fear.

With a panic-stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.

Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.

The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.

In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.

The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt.

When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of those people to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach, that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.

It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.

Lessons learnt from the story:

I understood I should not react in life; I should respond.

The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought out.

A beautiful way to understand LIFE: 

The HAPPY person is not happy because everything is RIGHT in his Life; he is HAPPY because his Attitude towards everything in his Life is Right!

Happily Ever After Is Coming

And they all lived happily ever after. So deeply imbedded in my psyche were these words, when I took high school literature classes, I struggled --greatly. Reading was my escape, my safe place. When everything around me was uncomfortable and unstructured, the order found in the stories I read was a panacea for my insecurity. The protagonist, the antagonist, the climax, and the euphoric resolution. It was all so neat and tidy. But Death of a Salesman? The Great Gatsby? What was I supposed to do with such pathos? What were themes and literary tools to me? I was simply rushing through all of the drama to get to the happy ending. Until there was none. Sometimes there isn't a happy ending --at least not one that meets our expectations or abides by our schedules. 

We love formulas; easy --or manageable, at least --solutions to the things we encounter. Our stomachs growl and we provide it with food. We go to work each day and collect our pay at the end of the week. Problem, solution, problem, solution, again and again. One happy ending after another. Creation itself testifies to the orderly God who created it. The sun rises, the sun sets, day gives way to night year after year. Spring follows Winter without fail; bitter, barren cold is always overcome by warmth and new life. The Bible is one intense saga of good broken by evil; the Hero enters, and evil is ultimately defeated, allowing good to reign eternally. Every word of it is true. But right now, we are living somewhere between the past eternity and the perfect eternity. Good has come, the Hero has arrived. It is Jesus, the Savior. He died that we and all of those before us and after us might be absolved of our responsibility to pay the price for our sins. He died that we might live free, that we might have an eternal quality of life even as our bodies exist in the bonds of mortality, even as we await that perfect eternity. There is still an evil ruler in this world. The physical has not yet been brought into agreement with the spiritual, and we are, as yet, unable to experience that ultimate happy ending --no matter how hard we race toward it, no matter how vehemently we demand it or expect it. But God, we pray, my plan is good. We need healing, we need a new place to live, our sons and daughters need to know Jesus. We hear the clock ticking and see the pages turning on the calendar. Time is running out and this hasn't yet been resolved. We're counting down the pages of this story, waiting for the Hero to once again make an entrance and save the day. Willy is still wallowing in his own delusions; Gatsby is dead. How can any of this be good?!

The perfect eternity has not yet come. We know the truth of the past, we know what God can do, and we must allow the wings of Hope to carry us through these days and into the perfect eternity. Prayer is answered, bodies are healed, obedience is rewarded, but not always in agreement with our timetable, and not always in the way we anticipate. It is by the blessed assurance of the past eternity we are able to proceed toward the perfect eternity. We can't always see it, we don't always like it, we may not even understand it, but we trust. We trust our Hero and we endure by the truth of His unchangeable character. We may not yet see our happily ever after, but we are promised it is there. In the meantime, we are tasked with being still and knowing. We are tasked with worship and prayer. We are tasked with going forth into all the world and sharing the Good News. We are tasked with loving others and seeking justice and caring for those in need. We are tasked with surrendering our selves that we might be transformed as we do these things. We've not been asked to rewrite one chapter. God's timing is perfect, and He is the ultimate designer, author, artist, and creator. No matter what we think or wish for outcomes, we have to know His are best; the perfect eternity, the happily ever after is yet to come!

In

It's been almost six months since my mother was completely released from the bonds of humanity. It sounds glorious, doesn't it? No more pain and confusion; no more waking up to unfamiliar faces. Mom is youthful, not just restored, but made whole --a wholeness she could never truly experience in this world! Where do I sign, right? Well, if you know Jesus, yours is coming. The One who is faithful and true, the One who keeps His promises has given His Spirit as a pledge of His word. And while all of that brings me tremendous comfort, my mother's absence has left a void so large I am still discovering its depths.  

Today, for instance, arrived as perfect walking weather. Lu and I and others from our neighborhood took advantage --including one of my mother's old friends just emerging from the winter. Of course I said hello, and of course he asked for my mom. She passed in October, I said gently. My condolences to you and your family, he replied. And I thought that was nice. Some part of my soul needed that. Almost six months later, I could finally receive it. At the time of her death, so many wonderful people wrote and texted and spoke beautiful sentiments, sweet remembrances of her, and kindnesses I could have never imagined! I was surrounded by love, but I was so numb and, at the same time, so overwhelmed by the compassion of others, it was difficult to process all of those things occurring simultaneously. Grief and comfort, pain and love, attempts to keep my heart in check so life could continue, focusing on "the good" I knew to be true over "the bad" I knew to be equally true. But today, with those kind words --My condolences to you and your family -- my heart felt the pain of loss but truly received comfort for the first time. No brushing it off as though I needed to hold it together, no clock ticking within my head,  measuring the time I'm in my feelings; just an experience of blessing in grief. Blessing.In.Grief. Not in place of, but all the while. 

In this world you will have trouble; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. ~ John 16:33

The Greek word translated "trouble" in this Scripture means oppression, affliction, distress, tribulation. This is going to hurt! It will not be easy! We will grieve, we will fall down, we will lose friends and be overdrawn on our accounts; we will receive death sentences and divorce papers and pink slips; we will watch our children walk away from every good thing we taught them and gave them; we will be falsely accused, we will question our faith, we will watch our dreams go up in smoke, we will be tempted by something so strong it makes our bodies ache. But be of good cheer, keep your head up, have courage, take comfort, imitate Christ, remain kind, guard your tongue, worship, hope. Why? Because Jesus has overcome all of that! We can sing and laugh while we weep and strive. In Christ, we have life, and abundantly! 

Jesus is brutally honest when He says this physical world will make it difficult for us to live spiritually; it can draw us away from eternity by its troubles (and sometimes by its pleasures). But by His power, trusting what He says is true, and hoping in all He has promised (guaranteed by what He has already done!), we can know that in God's time, relief, rescue, glory will come. We may not yet be completely released from the bonds of humanity in that we still reside here in flesh and bone, but in Christ, our spirits are free from following the dictates of this world's travails. We can bear loss and sadness deep within our souls because we have truth and hope. We can feel the weight of childlessness in our bodies because we have truth and hope. Our stomachs can growl with hunger while we stand on truth and have hope. Our very bones can ache from the illness that threatens to steal our joy, but one need not supplant the other; we stand on truth and hope. Our lives are built on Jesus while we traverse this physical realm, while we experience its limitations and adversities. Physical coexisting with spiritual. Because of Jesus, however, our spirit is not beholden to the physical; the spirit alone is eternal and imbued with the power that raised Jesus from His grave. Joy in pain. Peace in turmoil. Worship in fearfulness. Blessing in grief. 

And, as always, it is my prayer that you are found in Jesus on the day you too are completely released from the bonds of humanity.

Photo courtesy LuAnn Martin

Midweek: Community

John Donne, an English writer and cleric in the Church of England, lived a life of great ups and downs. In his early fifties, Donne became seriously ill, and was confined to bed, near the point of death. As he lay there day after day, he heard the bell toll out the death of others and, in his isolation, came to realize the interconnectedness of all our lives and our deaths. 

We are part of the same race, the human race, and like it or no, we have a responsibility to one another. 1 John 3:16-18 declares, By this we know love, because He (Jesus) laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth. 

What do you have that you can be sharing with others? As Christians, the most important thing we can share is Jesus, but the resources and talents we are given are often meant to bless others as well.   

John Donne came to realize he was just as desperate as the next guy, that his life was just as fleeting as others, and that we are a community. It is with his thoughts I leave you today.

"No Man Is an Island"

No man is an island,
Entire of itself;
Every man is a piece of the continent, 
A part of the main.

If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less,
As well as if a promontory were:
As well as if a manor of thy friend's
Or of thine own were.

Any man's death diminishes me,
Because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls;
It tolls for thee.

~ John Donne